3 ways to make gratitude more productive

Happy Thanksgiving!

Since my newsletter always goes out on Mondays, and Canadian Thanksgiving is today, it felt like the perfect moment to talk about gratitude.

But here’s the thing:

While digging into the benefits and how to optimize the practice, I came across something unexpected…

I’ve been doing gratitude practice wrong…

And I’m betting you have too.

So today, I'm sharing what I’ve learned.

Especially the new methods that are not only more effective but also don't need to be done daily to reap the benefits.

Now that’s productive gratitude indeed.

Let’s dive in.

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Before we begin: Here’s what you might have missed last week…

Big idea #1: The alternative mindset

Gratitude mindset > Gratitude practice 

Agree?

I don’t.

It’s like saying:

Health > Healthy diet 

But you need the diet to build the health, right?

Same goes for gratitude.

Gratitude practice is the foundation that builds your gratitude mindset.

Here’s what I mean:

• Mindset is the end goal → it's how you habitually view the world.

• Practice is the process → the intentional steps you take to get there.

Speaking of habits…

You can’t just wake up with a gratitude mindset overnight.

It takes consistency and repetition — just like building any skill or habit.

Especially because of the default negativity that humans are naturally wired to focus on.

It's a defense mechanism that kept our ancestors alert to danger.

But in today's world, it only leads to anxiety, stress, and isolation

Here’s what your default mindset is without gratitude:

• Complaints

• Criticism

• Gossip

When you reinforce these habits, you stay stuck in a defensive mindset.

You have to break this pattern.

Next time, have a simple goal: to notice when you do either of these.

• You cannot complain and be grateful at the same time.

• You cannot criticize and be grateful at the same time.

• You cannot gossip and be grateful at the same time.

You are making a choice.

Allow gratitude to interrupt these patterns.

At first, expressing gratitude will feel unnatural — like walking through a dense forest with no path.

But the more you practice, the easier it becomes.

Over time, a clear path forms, and eventually, it’s your default mindset.

The first step will be hard. So will the second one.

You have to put in the reps, strengthening those neural pathways until gratitude becomes second nature.

Big idea #2: Gain more perspective

Why do you struggle with gratitude?

The #1 reason is simple:

You lack perspective. 

When you feel stuck or ungrateful, it’s often because you’ve lost sight of the bigger picture.

The fix?

Gain more perspective. (Duh 🥲)

Here are three ways to do that:

• Travel → Experience different cultures and ways of living to see life through new lens.

• Serve and volunteer → Whether it’s mentoring someone or working in a soup kitchen, helping others reminds you of your own blessings.

• Learn stories from the past → Discover the challenges people faced centuries ago. Their resilience and hardships can help you gain perspective on your own life.

What other habits helped you gain more perspective?

Big idea #3: Make gratitude more productive

(This is the reason you opened this newsletter.)

It’s not that you’ve been practicing gratitude wrong, but there are ways to make it much more effective in bringing about benefits like:

• enhanced happiness

• improved relationships

• resilience when facing challenges

3 ways to make gratitude more productive:

1. Enhance gratitude through autonomic arousal

Before practicing gratitude, engage in activities that put your body into a sympathetic state (the part of the nervous system that increases alertness and readiness).

This primes your mind to be more receptive, adding richness to the experience.

How to do it:

• Take a cold bath or splash cold water on your face.

• Practice chanting or humming (vocal vibrations increase alertness).

• Engage in faster breathing techniques to create a similar effect.

By doing this, you prime your brain for a deeper gratitude experience.

2. Receiving gratitude is more effective than giving it

(This was the biggest surprise to me.)

While expressing gratitude is important, receiving it can actually have a greater effect on your brain.

When someone shares how your actions helped them, it activates the brain's reward circuits more deeply than giving thanks alone.

Hearing how you’ve positively impacted someone creates an emotional narrative — and stories have a profound effect on our emotions and memory.

Takeaways:

• The next time someone thanks you, truly listen and absorb the moment. (Maybe even write it down to use in the future.)

• Try this method as a new gratitude practice: Instead of thinking about what you’re grateful for, reflect on the last time someone genuinely expressed gratitude for your help.

• Aspire to help and serve more, because the more you do, the more chances you’ll hear appreciation from others.

3. Observe gratitude in action

Another overlooked way to amplify gratitude is by observing acts of kindness or moments of gratitude in others.

When we witness someone else receiving help or kindness, we experience vicarious gratitude.

Think back to a time when you saw someone helping another person. How did it feel?

Practicing gratitude doesn’t always need to be focused on your own life — witnessing gratitude in others can have an equally powerful effect.

These points, supported by Huberman’s research, make gratitude not just a mindset shift but a performance-enhancing practice.

Check out his entire podcast to learn more about this topic:

The Productivist Challenge: Improve your gratitude language

Gratitude is about more than just saying “thank you.”

It’s about expressing genuine appreciation, admiration, and love in ways that deeply resonate with others.

To truly elevate your gratitude, start expanding your language beyond the basics.

Here’s how:

• Admire the world around you 

  → Don’t just notice the sunset — tell someone how its vibrant colours remind you of life’s beauty.

  → Share how the crisp morning air invigorates your spirit or how the flavours of a well-prepared meal bring you joy.

  → Paint vivid pictures with your words to show you’re fully present.

• Write love letters 

  → Not just to your partner, but to friends, family, or even yourself.

  → Take the time to express why you appreciate them, detailing how their presence has made a meaningful impact on your life.

  → You don’t even have to share those letters, but I hope you do.

By regularly practicing and refining the language of gratitude, you’ll not only amplify love in your words but also inspire deeper, more heartfelt connections in your actions.

The Productivist Question:

Close your eyes and think of the time someone expressed gratitude to you.

How did it feel?

I am truly grateful for your time and the energy you give to learning and growing. It’s admirable. Keep it up 🙏

Wish you a wonderful week ahead,

Valeriya

PS: What’s the biggest a-ha for you here? Let me know by hitting reply or DMing me on LinkedIn!

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